If We Were Having Strawberry Shortcake…

Strawberry Shortcake!

Shortbread biscuit, big scoop of vanilla ice cream, generous serving of strawberries drenched in juice that spilled onto both hands and one shoe, and dollop of whipped cream that the top of the box flattened and made slightly less photogenic. This seven-dollar fundraiser dessert was fine by me.

I realize the popular thing for bloggers looking to commiserate with other bloggers is to participate in the popular #WeekendCoffeeShare, in which everyone pretends they’re drinking coffee while rambling about personal goings-on and this interaction eventually translates into superstar writing careers for one and all. I’ve never tried it because I’m not great at blogging according to a calendar (mine or anyone else’s), it’s established fact that I’m terrible at networking and will therefore toil in obscurity till I die satisfied with my choices, I never go to the kind of coffeehouses that serve coffee worth photographing, and I tend to avoid topics that would necessitate resorting to stock photos unless my brain refuses to let such a topic go. But I have new photos from a special occasion today, and a busy night ahead of me before an even busier weekend after that, so I ask your forgiveness for stream-of-consciousness multitasking a smidge outside the box.

Right this way for Indy outdoor photos plus rambling!

Yes, There’s a Scene After the “X-Men: Apocalypse” End Credits

X-Men Apocalypse!

In an unprecedented negotiation victory, the cast’s contracts allowed them to rewrite the entire screenplay between takes to their own satisfaction and without the director’s input. Believe it or not!

Marvel’s merry mutants are back! Academy Award Winner Jennifer Lawrence and her amazingly lower-paid friends return for X-Men: Apocalypse, the ninth film in a cinematic universe that’s unwritten at least 3¾ previous installments out of its own continuity. Everything you thought you knew, every film you thought was worth saving, every character you thought was more important than other characters, you’re wrong. Shut up, go to the concession stand, and don’t come back until you agree to stop thinking so hard about any of this. Just be happy that director Bryan Singer is finally telling the one major story that You, the Viewers at Home, clearly demanded most: the secret origin of Professor X’s bald head.

Continue reading

Our 2011 Road Trip, Part 5: Toys R Us Kicks

T-Rex!

[The very special miniseries continues! See Part One for the official intro and context.]

It’s our first evening in New York City. We’re in Times Square. We’re wandering and gaping and acting like overwhelmed tourists. It’s who we are. We knew sooner or later we had to enter a store instead of just staring at their flickering big-screen ads.

They say there are eight million stories in the naked city. Nine million if you count its toys.

Continue reading

2016 Ain’t Nothing But a Number

2016!

Muhammad Ali. Prince. David Bowie. Alan Rickman. Patty Duke. Garry Shandling. Nancy Reagan. Abe Vigoda. Raymond’s mom. Frank Drebin’s boss. Grizzly Adams. TV’s Schneider. The Phantasm guy.

For these names and others you’d recognize, 2016 has been a bad year. Whenever three or more well-regarded famous people die within the same year, that year’s name is mud. Everyone curses its name and declares it Worst Year Ever. Add in one or more horrifying wide-scale tragedies, and that year will never be allowed a moment of recognition for all the good it hosted. 2016 isn’t halfway over, but if it were an internet user, it would already be receiving daily death threats and getting trolled into oblivion by millions of typists blinded by fury at all the implied promises broken by that stupid backstabbing jerk Baby New Year 2016. Remember in January when Ryan Seacrest invited us all to welcome that baby with open arms and hearts and hopes? Now WE HATE THAT BABY SO MUCH. THANKS, SEACREST.

Continue reading

Big Burgers and Other Bites at My Birthday Bonanza

New Jack City!

This boy’s big ballyhooed birthday burger banquet at The B Spot.

My wife and I have a twice-yearly tradition of spending our respective birthdays together traveling to some new place or attraction as a one-day road trip — partly as an excuse to spend time together on those most wondrous days, partly to explore areas of Indiana we’ve never experienced before. My 2016 birthday destination of choice: the northern Indiana city of Elkhart, with a bonus stopover in South Bend, both some 100+ miles north of here. Elkhart was regrettably cut a little short because the weather was miserable and tried to freeze us in our tracks, but we had enough fun to fill out another four-part miniseries starring a candy factory tour, a super-hero roadside attraction, and a selection of the “art” in Elkhart. Also, food.

Part Four of Four: that food! It wouldn’t have been my birthday without it. Only one of our three meals was in Elkhart, and it wasn’t a full meal, but I do hope you’ll forgive the aging birthday guy his occasional off-topic digressions. I hear it’ll get worse as I get older.

Right this way for random acts of meat!

Our 2011 Road Trip, Part 4: You Can’t Spell Times Square Without “Mess”

Times Square!

The glitz! The glamor! The glory! The ads for washers and insurance and Michael Bay films!

[The very special miniseries continues! See Part One for the official intro and context.]

After escaping Newark with our lives, we docked our car at scenic Lincoln Harbor in harmless midscale Weehawken and checked in to our unexpectedly swank hotel. Despite the modest AAA three-diamond rating, our room had two flatscreen TVs, a toilet with two different kinds of flushing buttons, gold-toned bathroom fixtures, an anteroom with couch and spacious desk, luxurious non-threadbare blankets, free AT&T Wi-Fi, and an impeccable, fawning staff. We appreciated the amenities, even though we didn’t need ’em ’cause now we were all hardcore. It’s funny, how driving through Newark changes a man.

With our luggage dropped off and our sense of adventure fully stoked, we took a New Jersey Transit bus through the nearby Lincoln Tunnel (which for me was a moment of WHEEEEE! because long dark tunnels are a peculiar source of fun) and disembarked inside the legendary Port Authority, a multi-level labyrinthine nexus of countless bus stops and other mass-transit connections. Depressing, bustling, underlit, and energetic all at once, the Port Authority and its assorted mall-shaped stores would be our transportation hub for the week.

Right this way to our first set of Times Square photos!

Indy 500 Festival Parade 2016: Before the Music

DARK THOMAS.

Meanwhile behind the scenes, things were falling apart.

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover:

This year marked the sixth time my wife and I attended the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade in downtown Indianapolis. It’s an annual date-day tradition for us —- partly to see the floats and high school marching bands, partly for the famous names and partly because I love the sight of a bustling downtown Indianapolis. The next six entries (to be posted over the next few days as quickly as time and attention span permit) represent a fraction of the pics my wife and I snapped. In many cases, encores and additional takes of specific subjects may be available if anyone out there is interested in seeing more, or is looking for a loved one who was in one of the many marching bands that day. For first-time MCC visitors, please note my wife and I are relative amateurs, absolutely not trained professional photographers, sharing these from a hobbyist standpoint because fun and joy.

Part 6, the grand finale: hours before the parade began, Anne and I walked up and down Meridian Street and Pennsylvania, the parallel north-south legs of the parade route, to peek behind the curtains at some of the participating teams and objects as they got their acts together before the official proceedings commenced for an adoring, sweating public. I participated in a 500 Festival Parade myself several years ago, but never took much time to look beyond my own group. Until now.

Right this way for a very special MCC miniseries finale!

Indy 500 Festival Parade 2016 Photos #5: Random Acts of Parading

Indianapolis Chinese Community Center!

Dancers from the Indianapolis Chinese Community Center.

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover:

This year marked the sixth time my wife and I attended the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade in downtown Indianapolis. It’s an annual date-day tradition for us —- partly to see the floats and high school marching bands, partly for the famous names and partly because I love the sight of a bustling downtown Indianapolis. The next six entries (to be posted over the next few days as quickly as time and attention span permit) represent a fraction of the pics my wife and I snapped. In many cases, encores and additional takes of specific subjects may be available if anyone out there is interested in seeing more, or is looking for a loved one who was in one of the many marching bands that day. For first-time MCC visitors, please note my wife and I are relative amateurs, absolutely not trained professional photographers, sharing these from a hobbyist standpoint because fun and joy.

In this entry: parade participant potpourri! Organizations and teams who didn’t ride in on a float or bring any musical instruments with them; random vehicles that showed up and rode along; and a few outtakes from previous entries that I just couldn’t let go.

Continue reading

Indy 500 Festival Parade 2016 Photos #4: Floats and Balloons

Angry Bird Red!

My wife and I are among the six people worldwide who’ve never played any version of Angry Birds, but I think this one’s the main character and his name is J. Reddington Angryshire.

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover:

This year marked the sixth time my wife and I attended the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade in downtown Indianapolis. It’s an annual date-day tradition for us —- partly to see the floats and high school marching bands, partly for the famous names and partly because I love the sight of a bustling downtown Indianapolis. The next six entries (to be posted over the next few days as quickly as time and attention span permit) represent a fraction of the pics my wife and I snapped. In many cases, encores and additional takes of specific subjects may be available if anyone out there is interested in seeing more, or is looking for a loved one who was in one of the many marching bands that day. For first-time MCC visitors, please note my wife and I are relative amateurs, absolutely not trained professional photographers, sharing these from a hobbyist standpoint because fun and joy.

In this entry: the balloons and floats that are an integral component of every worthy large-scale parade. Cartoon characters, celebrations of local corporate concerns, salutes to worthy organizations, and, most importantly, more Angry Birds.

Right this way for someone’s favorite cartoon characters and more!

Indy 500 Festival Parade 2016 Photos #3: Marching Bands!

Indiana All-Star Band!

The Indiana All-Star Band all but begs me to make the easy Captain America joke. But I can resist. I CAN.

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover:

This year marked the sixth time my wife and I attended the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade in downtown Indianapolis. It’s an annual date-day tradition for us —- partly to see the floats and high school marching bands, partly for the famous names and partly because I love the sight of a bustling downtown Indianapolis. The next six entries (to be posted over the next few days as quickly as time and attention span permit) represent a fraction of the pics my wife and I snapped. In many cases, encores and additional takes of specific subjects may be available if anyone out there is interested in seeing more, or is looking for a loved one who was in one of the many marching bands that day. For first-time MCC visitors, please note my wife and I are relative amateurs, absolutely not trained professional photographers, sharing these from a hobbyist standpoint because fun and joy.

In this entry: the full rundown on all the marching bands that performed in this year’s parade, including several from other states, who brought us the gift of music and an occasional smile when the long walk wasn’t getting them down. My wife was in high school marching band once, remembers those drawbacks all too well, feels your pain, and appreciates your sacrifice and talents.

Super-special note: if you’re in, or know someone who’s in, one of the following bands and would like to see more photos of them, please let us know. Either leave me a note in the comments section below or use the “Contact MCC!” form located up in the masthead. We’re used to receiving a few such requests every year and we’re more than happy to help out band members and their supporters. Between the two of us, though, we took over 700 photos this year. I’m not going into photo overkill mode and uploading hundreds of extra pics until and unless I know someone besides us is genuinely invested in any of them. Not all of them are pro quality, but there’re a few keepers.

The following marching bands performed at the 2016 Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade, and in the order presented here, two shots for each musical act. Non-musical marching acts will be showcased in Part 5.

Continue reading

Indy 500 Festival Parade 2016 Photos #2: This Year’s Guests

Kevin Sorbo!

TV’s Hercules bids you welcome and asks that you keep your applause to a thundering roar.

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover:

This year marked the sixth time my wife and I attended the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade in downtown Indianapolis. It’s an annual date-day tradition for us —- partly to see the floats and high school marching bands, partly for the famous names and partly because I love the sight of a bustling downtown Indianapolis. The next six entries (to be posted over the next few days as quickly as time and attention span permit) represent a fraction of the pics my wife and I snapped. In many cases, encores and additional takes of specific subjects may be available if anyone out there is interested in seeing more, or is looking for a loved one who was in one of the many marching bands that day. For first-time MCC visitors, please note my wife and I are relative amateurs, absolutely not trained professional photographers, sharing these from a hobbyist standpoint because fun and joy.

In this entry: the actors, musicians, local politicians, and other notable personalities invited to join this year’s procession. We’re finding that we recognize fewer faces with each passing year, but maybe they’ll mean a lot more to you than to us. So enjoy for us!

Continue reading

Indy 500 Festival Parade 2016 Photos #1: The 33 Drivers in Your Starting Lineup

13 Scott Dixon!

Inside Row 5, car #9, 2008 Indy 500 winner Scott Dixon. (“Quick, while Mommy and Daddy are busy, see if you can find any twenties!”)

This year marked the sixth time my wife and I attended the Indianapolis 500 Festival Parade in downtown Indianapolis. It’s an annual date-day tradition for us —- partly to see the floats and high school marching bands, partly for the famous names (even if the rest of the audience loves them more than we do), and partly because I love the sight of a bustling downtown Indianapolis (which needs to happen every single weekend ever).

The next six entries (to be posted over the next few days as quickly as time and health permit) represent a fraction of the pics my wife and I snapped. In many cases, encores and additional takes of specific subjects may be available if anyone out there is interested in seeing more, or is looking for a loved one who was in one of the many marching bands that day. For first-time MCC visitors, please note my wife and I are relative amateurs, absolutely not trained professional photographers, sharing these from a hobbyist standpoint because fun and joy.

First up: your qualifying drivers in the milestone 100th running of the Indianapolis 500 at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, to be held Sunday, May 29, 2016 — i.e., the next day after I’m writing this. This may be the first time we’ve ever captured all thirty-three drivers in a given Indy 500 to at least some degree, as there’s usually a driver or two that totally dodge our cameras and we don’t get so much as a stray hand or a blurry Sasquatch image. A few drivers regrettably suffer here from interfering limbs, long distances, or other barriers, but the overall results for this year’s gallery were more encouraging than ever.

Other than Scott Dixon pictured above (our favorite pic of the bunch), the following drivers are presented in actual Indy 500 starting order from Row 11 to Row 1, barring any last-minute lineup adjustments in the morning. As always, photos are clickable for enlargement and resolution where desirable, or you can print out a copy of this entry and use it as your handy reference guide while you’re watching, listening to, or dreaming about the Greatest Spectacle in Racing. Enjoy!

Continue reading

Spare the Cupcakes, Spoil the Student

Mini-Cupcakes!

My mom’s final day of employment is May 31st, but her retirement party was this afternoon, because who wants to party the day after Memorial Day? Granted, several coworkers took today off to lengthen their three-day weekend and technically voted against partying in a sense — or at least partying with us — but we could only push the date back so far. Preceding the party was a prodigious lunch pitch-in with a spread that included spaghetti, chicken fingers, BBQ meatballs, two pasta salads, one actual salad, macaroni ‘n’ cheese, scalloped potatoes, one hundred bags of potato chips, an assortment of grocery bakery department desserts, and my own acclaimed, freshly baked brownies. The interdepartmental team effort treated Mom like a queen.

Unfortunately that noontime feast left most of the retirement party guests with no appetite later. We expected a certain catering surplus, but still overestimated our needs. Our simple refreshments comprised one bowl of mandatory weird fruit soda hybrid punch and four dozen mini-cupcakes. By the end of the shindig the punch was gone, but we had three dozen mini-cupcakes to spare.

Right this way for just two more paragraphs!

Our 2011 Road Trip, Part 3: New Jersey Gothic

Us!

The Garden State wasn’t all bad, but I faintly recall my son not being the most cooperative photographer.

[The very special miniseries continues! See Part One for the official intro and context.]

After the brief stopover in Harrisburg, the next two hours and the next four interstates were less invigorating than I would’ve liked. The Pennsylvania Turnpike must have a monopoly on the state’s best scenery. Mostly we passed the time scanning the local radio channels and learning that the Pennsylvania airwaves are made of top-40. Fifteen channels seemed to be playing the same six songs nonstop, a statewide revival in honor of Katy Perry and Lady Ga-Ga, America’s new First Ladies or whatever.

Next stop was across the state line in New Jersey, in a verdant, elegantly sculpted community called Whippany. Judging by the slanderous slings and arrows that New Jersey has taken over the decades, we expected something like an all-white Boyz n the Hood or a low-budget adaptation of Dante’s Inferno. On the contrary, Whippany was glorious, well-paved suburbia. I love seeing stereotypes busted.

Continue reading

You Can’t Spell “Elkhart” Without “Art”. Or “Hart”. Or “Elk”.

HEART Proverbs 4-23!

Or if we’re anagramming, in Elkhart you can also find “heart”, “heat”, “earth”, “talker”, “hater”, “lathe”, “kale”…

My wife and I have a twice-yearly tradition of spending our respective birthdays together traveling to some new place or attraction as a one-day road trip — partly as an excuse to spend time together on those most wondrous days, partly to explore areas of Indiana we’ve never experienced before. My 2016 birthday destination of choice: the northern Indiana city of Elkhart, with a bonus stopover in South Bend, both some 100+ miles north of here. Elkhart was regrettably cut a little short because the weather was miserable and tried to freeze us in our tracks, but we had enough fun to fill out another four-part miniseries starring a candy factory tour, a super-hero roadside attraction, and a selection of the “art” in Elkhart. Also, food.

Part Three of Four: a tour of the art of downtown Elkhart, which of course has deer statues, because “elk”. And “hart”, which is a bit more obscure except maybe to fans of Angel. And the sound of “heart” alone likewise doesn’t go unmentioned.

Continue reading

Our 2011 Road Trip, Part 2: The Harrisburg Highlight

Pennsylvania State Capitol!

[The very special miniseries continues! See Part One for the official intro and context.]

DAY TWO — Sunday, July 10, 2011.

After unremarkable free breakfast at unremarkable hotel, we took a jaunt down the road to Harrisburg, which we’d driven through in 2010 without stopping. We’d skipped it because our searches for “Harrisburg tourism” kept turning up the Pennsylvania State Capitol dome as its #1 attraction. The same thing happened to us in 2008 with Charleston, WV, where their gold-leaf Capitol dome was virtually the only notable feature in all the city and in all the Internet. You’d think any really exciting state capital should have its Capitol Dome ranked around #7 or #8 behind a glorious selection of roadside attractions or amusement parks. We knew Harrisburg would be larger and theoretically more interesting, but Capitol domes alone don’t much preoccupy us. 2010 wasn’t the first time we’d driven through a state capital without stopping for at least one sight. (Richmond, VA, we fail to salute you!)

This year, our New Cumberland hotel was right there in the thick of Harrisburg’s interstate construction. Anne was interested but would’ve been willing to bypass it a second time if it hadn’t been so darn convenient. We were right there. A few minutes wouldn’t hurt.

Right this way for more views of Pennsylvania greenery!

Bloc Party, The Vaccines, Oscar: My British Alt-Rock Party Night

Bloc Party at The Vogue!

Dateline: May 21, 2016 — Just woke up the morning after my first concert at The Vogue in 2½ years (see previous happy experience). At one of Indianapolis’ most well-known nightclubs in the heart of the Broad Ripple neighborhood, three catchy bands appeared on a single bill for an appallingly low price of $25. When I bought my ticket back in February, Bloc Party was the only reason and the only band on the bill. The Vaccines were added as co-billed headliners mere weeks before the main event. For the value and the all-around fantastic performances we got, I’m not complaining.

Right this way for photos and setlists!

Our 2011 Road Trip, Part 1: The Road to New York

Manhattan!

Witness our first photos of Manhattan taken during — and stitched together after — our 2010 road trip, from the ferry on our way from the New Jersey shore to Liberty Island. A separate road-trip series for another time.

[Welcome to the first installment of a very special miniseries, representing the original travelogue from our family’s 2011 vacation to fabulous New York City, by which we largely mean Manhattan because we ended up skipping our to-do lists for all the other boroughs. Additional stops in New Jersey and Pennsylvania may not be proper consolation for anyone who was hoping to hear our thoughts on Coney Island or the Bronx Zoo. We’re revisiting this now because we’re planning on revisiting NYC in July 2016, hopefully with a better eye toward the areas beyond the rivers.

Some hindsight editing and modern-day commentary will be included along the way as value-added bonus features for readers old and new alike. All photos were taken either with my first Canon PowerShot or with my ancient Kodak EasyShare that became my wife Anne’s hand-me-down device for the next few years. Very little about these entries will approach 1080p quality, but we’ll do what we can with the materials at hand. Despite the Great Hard Drive Crash of July 2015, my wife saved backups of all of our digital vacation photos to Shutterfly, and you have no idea how excited I am to report that, on this very night, I’ve figured out how to download decently sized file copies for free instead of resorting to frustratingly inadequate screen shots. Science marches on.

Enjoy!]

Right this way for Chapter One in a very special MCC series! (CAUTION: It’s just a prologue.)

House Party at the Hall of Heroes

Hall of Heroes!

Gathered together from the cosmic reaches of the universe, here in this great Hall of Heroes, are the most powerful forces of good ever assembled: Captain America! Deadpool! Bucky! Cartoon Hulk! The Lizard!

My wife and I have a twice-yearly tradition of spending our respective birthdays together traveling to some new place or attraction as a one-day road trip — partly as an excuse to spend time together on those most wondrous days, partly to explore areas of Indiana we’ve never experienced before. My 2016 birthday destination of choice: the northern Indiana city of Elkhart, with a bonus stopover in South Bend, both some 100+ miles north of here. Elkhart was regrettably cut a little short because the weather was miserable and tried to freeze us in our tracks, but we had enough fun to fill out another four-part miniseries starring a candy factory tour, a super-hero roadside attraction, and a selection of the “art” in Elkhart. Also, food.

Part Two of Four: a birthday celebration for a venerated super-hero at a museum made by a fan for fans.

Right this way for a glimpse inside the Hall of Heroes Museum!

Hot Latte and the Chocolate Factory

Dark Chocolates!

One quarter-pound of Double Dark Truffles garnished by two dark-chocolate-covered Oreos. Yep, I’ve reached that advanced age when dark chocolate begins tasting better than milk chocolate.

My wife and I have a twice-yearly tradition of spending our respective birthdays together traveling to some new place or attraction as a one-day road trip — partly as an excuse to spend time together on those most wondrous days, partly to explore areas of Indiana we’ve never experienced before. My 2016 birthday destination of choice: the northern Indiana city of Elkhart, with a bonus stopover in South Bend, both some 100+ miles north of here. Elkhart was regrettably cut a little short because the weather was miserable and tried to freeze us in our tracks, but we had enough fun to fill out another four-part miniseries starring a candy factory tour, a super-hero roadside attraction, and a selection of the “art” in Elkhart. Also, food.

Part One of Four: a tour through a chocolate factory, conducted without a single child casualty. It can be done, Mr. Wonka, you demented jerk.

Right this way for the tour, the machines, and the chocolate!