Yes, There’s a Scene After the “Django Unchained” End Credits

Christoph Waltz, Jamie Foxx, Django UnchainedI hadn’t originally planned to see Quentin Tarantino’s Django Unchained. Unlike many of my longtime Internet peers, his films aren’t an automatic draw for me. Though Reservoir Dogs has been a qualified favorite of mine since college, the rest have been a mixed bag. His previous work, Inglorious Badwerds, was a mature, complex, riveting film about WWII and about the role of film in WWII, but was hampered by Brad Pitt’s Kentucky-fried B-movie brigade who snuck in from the direct-to-video good-ol’-boys revenge flick next door. From the trailers, Django looked to me like a 2-cool-4-school blaxploitation Western. Call it Shaft in Texas or Black Grit. Despite the talented cast involved and the joyous responses from the critical majority, it didn’t really sound like my kind of movie.

Then it was nominated for the Best Picture Oscar. As explained in a previous entry, I’ve watched every Best Picture nominee since 1997, whether I was enthusiastic about them or not. On this technicality alone, I checked Django out.

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Advance Movie Screenings: Pros and Cons

Broken City ticket stubThe advance screening of Broken City I attended last night was made possible through a marketing promotion run by a social-event notification service, from which I’d considered unsubscribing months prior. Lucky for me, their very first useful offer crossed my path at just the right time.

Just so we’re clear: last night’s entry was not a paid product review. I’m not opposed to attempting one of those on principle, but for some reason no one submits such offers to the occasionally biased sarcastic guy, even one who sometimes enjoys the things he tries. Also, in blogosphere big-picture terms, I’m still small-fry. Dare to dream, though.

One of the advantages of living in a city of above-average size is that we have enough theaters and moviegoers to warrant sporadic attention from the major studios, who use advance screenings as one of the handy tools in their marketing toolbox. Theoretically the studio partners with a theater to hold one screening of an upcoming film to a full house of Average Joes before its official release date. Said Joes reciprocate the favor by spending the saved ticket money on refreshments instead; sitting through the movie, perhaps a little more patiently than usual since it was free; then sharing their love for the movie across their personal social-media outlets of choice. You become their li’l marketing assistant for an evening, and your paycheck is a flick of their choosing.

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Advance Review: “Broken City”

Mark Wahlberg, "Broken City"Some evenings at the theater, the marquee only has two choices: $200 million action blockbusters and $5,000 found-footage camcorder flicks. If you’re yearning for a simple, mid-sized film with no CGI monsters and at least two famous actors, Broken City offers an R-rated option for fans of crime drama in general and tough-talking guys in particular. It’s a capable primer for anyone who’s never seen a film about political scandal or government corruption, and comfort food for those who can’t get enough of watching little guys taking down big dogs.

Mark Wahlberg is Billy Taggart, a former policeman who lost his badge over a controversial incident involving a homicidal rapist. He now runs his own PI business, though his clients are mostly deadbeats and his photos are amateurish. Russell Crowe is NYC Mayor Nicholas Hostetler, up for yet another reelection and riding high publicity on the sale of the low-income Bolton Village tenement area for a cool four billion bucks, nicely covering the city’s billion-dollar deficit and leaving plenty of surplus to earn him good Election Day will. Hostetler faces challenges on two fronts: his election opponent, smarmy upper-crust councilman Jack Valliant (Barry Pepper, who turns from stiff-upper-lip to unsettling devastation when things go wrong for him); and his wife Cathleen (Catherine Zeta-Jones, an Oscar-winning placeholder), who may be cheating on him. Or he may be paranoid. Or evil.

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“Bunheads” 1/14/2013: Many Happy Returns from Camp Wannapamothpa

Cozette, Jeanine Mason, Bunheads

Cosette the Cosmopolitan: friend, foe, rival, or everyone’s new role model?

Last week on Bunheads was the mandatory conclusion in which the our broken-up old team finally set aside their differences and arrest warrants, and came together once more for the good of the town and the premise of the show. This week, class is back in session in the new episode titled “Channing Tatum is a Fine Actor”. Ballet recitals have resumed, and even the adult tap class is back on the schedule, if a bit jealous that no one ever pays to watch them perform The Nutcracker. That’s best for all involved, really — if Michelle had mistakenly maced these mothers and grandmothers, I can imagine several of them Macing her right back. The last thing Paradise needs is an all-out Mace war.

In happier news: Carl Cramer is back! Boo’s effervescent boyfriend returns after his annual six-week retreat at Camp Wannapamothpa, named after a Native American phrase so covert that it defies even Google’s almighty reach. Boo fusses about preparing for him first, but no such luck — good ol’ Carl (Casey J. Adler) is thrilled to see her, hand-carved her a Katniss Everdeen quiver as a gift, and doesn’t care that she’s sweaty and saw Magic Mike twice while he was away. Thus does Carl have the honor of seeing his sunny-side response to Boo’s confession used as the episode title. I didn’t make up that title myself.

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My 2012 Comic Books in Retrospect: the All-Stars and the Abandoned

Kid Loki and Leah in "Journey into Mystery" #639, story page 11, panels 1-22012 was my worst year for comic book enjoyment in the last fifteen years. I’ve collected them for thirty-four years, ever since the well-stocked spinner racks at Marsh Supermarket caught my eye at age six and opened new worlds of imagination and heroism. For the majority of my life they’ve been my primary hobby among all my hobbies. Once upon a time, friends could count on me to spout the occasional essay about a particular series, event, historical recollection, or rage-filled response to an aesthetic offense. When I launched Midlife Crisis Crossover last April, I thought the topic of comic books would inspire a lot more posts than they have so far.

I have no plans to wave farewell to the medium altogether, but my personal backlash started during the last half of 2011, when DC Comics purged their continuity yet again and rebooted their entire universe with the “New 52” initiative. The first time they rebooted after Crisis on Infinite Earths, I was fourteen and the combined talents of John Byrne, George Perez, Marv Wolfman, Mike Baron, and others were more than enough to convince me that this new direction was right up my alley. Twenty-six years and countless post-Crisis emendations later, DC and I are no longer the same entities under the same conditions. I can handle reboots to a certain extent, but when the new versions are poorly thought out — or worse, prone to twice as many crossovers as they used to be — I exercise my right as a consumer to opt out.

Marvel’s response was to concentrate on crossovers for a while longer, then roll out their own restarts without rebooting. I’ve found their results a little less alienating, but they’re still leaving some of my money on the table. Image stepped up mightily for a while and snatched some of my leftover Big Two bucks, but their titles have varied in quality and performance. I was glad to see other publishers continue earning attention from me as well — Dark Horse, BOOM!, IDW, Red 5, Valiant, and even Aspen. Again, results varied, but I appreciated the alternatives they offered.

Even though I’m increasingly disappointed with the current majority readership’s predilection for overspending on prequels, crossovers, and do-overs, my year had several bright spots in the world of monthly titles. (For purposes of personal categorization, I treat original graphic novels and trade paperback collections as “Books”, which are grouped and ranked separately from “Comic Books” in my head. Those might be fodder for a separate MCC list.)

The following were my favorite comic book series throughout 2012:

* Journey into Mystery — Kieron Gillen, Rich Elson, and other artists delivered one of the very few series that inspired any MCC thoughts at all, and ended their two-year storyline on a note of epic tragedy. After seeing the reincarnated Kid Loki and his best frenemy Leah through so many misadventures (not to mention the only A-plus crossover tie-ins of any crossover by any company in the last two years), I felt helpless and bereaved to see it all coming crashing down ’round his ears. Marvel’s formerly unrepentant trickster god was so close to redeeming himself for his previous lifetime of treachery and lies, albeit by finding clever ways to wield treachery and lies as forces for Good, only to see everything fall apart because of the lies he told himself and us. I wish every series aspired to thematic examinations this complex and riveting. More fire-breathing angry puppies like lethal li’l Thori would also be welcome.

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The Academy Awards: Art Appreciation as My Big Guilty Pleasure

Oscars, Academy AwardsEvery year I follow exactly one (1) awards ceremony, ye olde Oscars. I care not one whit for the Golden Globes, the Peoples Choice Awards, or the various awards from industry guilds or critics’ cliques. I have no use for the Emmys, the Grammys, the American Music Awards, the Harveys, the Eisners, any award set beginning with “MTV”, or the Tonys, though I might be amenable to the latter if Manhattan ever moved next door to me. Since I don’t care for sports, I’m also left out of everyone else’s trophy excitement for the Super Bowl, the World Series, or whatever basketball calls their season finale.

My family knows the Academy Awards are always a major appointment on my calendar. Per my usual routine, I’m now counting down to the 85th Academy Awards ceremony, to be held Sunday, February 24th. Also per routine, I’ve already scheduled a vacation day for Monday the 25th so I can stay up late, arrange my annual write-up, and have some margin in case the horrendous happens and the ceremony drags past the six-hour mark because of incomprehensible dance numbers. Attempts to interfere with this itinerary are not recommended and end in unholy acrimony.

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MCC Request Line #6: “Les Miserables”

Hugh Jackman, Les MiserablesWelcome once again to the Midlife Crisis Crossover Request Line, in which recommendations from MCC fans send me reading, viewing, and reviewing assorted art and art-like objects, either because they want a proxy to evaluate the damage, or because my life won’t be complete without seeing them. Today’s suggestion came from Niki, one of MCC’s most dedicated fellow Bunheads fans. (Believe it or not, I hadn’t forgotten!)

Today’s subject: The world-famous Les Miserables, the mammoth French novel turned immortal Broadway play turned Hollywood film (not for its first time), today nominated for twelve Academy Awards. Niki’s original suggestion was for any version of the tale, but for some reason our local big-box stores have yet to be flooded with copies of the previous Liam Neeson/Geoffrey Rush version. The touring version of the musical performed in Indianapolis at some point, but that was before I received the suggestion. Blame the timing.

What I knew beforehand: It’s a big, famous book. More people have probably seen the musical than read the book. I knew it had characters named Jean Valjean and Inspector Javert, whose cat-and-mouse routine was an early precursor to The Fugitive. A tiny girl was prominent in all the musical’s ads and best-selling merchandise. That’s really all I knew before walking in.

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“Bunheads” 1/7/2013: Return of the Nutcracker Macer

Bunheads, episode 11

What happens in Henderson, NV, dies in Henderson, NV.

If you began following Midlife Crisis Crossover after September 1, 2012, a bit of reintroduction is in order:

Last summer I found myself addicted to an unusual new ABC Family series, thanks to a sneak preview for which I had zero expectations. The dance-crazy dramedy Bunheads surprised me with its rapid-fire dialogue, spark-filled cast, and copious pop-culture references — and not the same tired quotes from, say, Casablanca or The Wizard of Oz. How many shows do you know that are off-kilter enough to make cracks about Martin Scorsese’s Kundun years after the fact, regardless of whether or not you could possibly envision the character sitting still long enough to watch the whole thing? I’ve never been a big fan of ballet, shows where the males are wildly outnumbered, or ABC Family, but Bunheads had me hooked from episode one. When the material is high-quality, I don’t care about its genre. Regrettably, I’ve seen very little of creator Amy Sherman-Palladino’s most famous series, Gilmore Girls, but I appreciated the input from trusty readers who filled me in on GG-related Easter eggs and casting coups that Bunheads apparently relishes. Someday I’ll have to borrow my mom’s DVD sets.

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Best CDs of 2012, According to an OId Guy Who Bought Seven

Whether on or off the Internet, I very rarely discuss music. I was a typical top-40 fan as a child, but segued to “alternative music” circa 1989 thanks to the late-night lineups of Post-Modern MTV and 120 Minutes that kept me company over homework into the wee hours every evening. I’ve followed musical acts of varying degrees of talent and volume ever since. I don’t consider myself finicky, but I’m not interested in 99% of the bands that receive mainstream coverage nowadays. I rarely discover new bands because local radio is a joke and I haven’t felt compelled to subscribe to satellite radio yet. You can bet the aging process hasn’t exactly broadened my vistas. As for the disparate gulf between my lifelong musical tastes and my present-day spiritual mindset, that’s a subject for another essay altogether.

I have the hardest time keeping track of when the musicians I still follow finally release new albums, but in 2012 I stumbled across six such occasions, and on another occasion tried one (1) relatively new act with pleasing results. I also bought one reissue, relegated to a separate category of its own. The following list scratches the surface of my purchasing preferences and may or may not provide any insight into me at all.

And just so we’re clear, I really did buy all seven albums on CD. My disdain for collecting digital music is also a subject for another essay altogether.

On with the countdown:

7. Joey Ramone, “…Ya Know?”. If I’m understanding the candid liner notes correctly, the Ramones frontman’s first album since his death in 2004 was constructed from vocal recordings acrimoniously wrested through litigious means from the hands of frequent Ramones collaborator Daniel Rey. The bulk of the posthumous backup-band work is by Joey’s brother Mickey Leigh, late-’80s Ramones producer Ed Stasium, and assorted studio musicians, though a few familiar names also contributed — mid-’80s bandmate Richie Ramone; Bun E. Carlos from Cheap Trick; Steven Van Zandt; Dennis Diken from the Smithereens; and Joan Jett, though her part is reduced to backing vocals on “21st Century Girl” rather than a true duet. It’s nice to hear one last Joey collection, though the assemblage of various artists creates a sterile, corporate-bar-band sound too diluted to approximate the vintage Ramones buzzsaw sound. (Sample track: “Rock ‘n Roll is the Answer“.)

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My 2012 Movies in Retrospect: the Top Seven

Previously in our three-part miniseries, Part One was the bottom of the barrel and Part Two was the middle of the road. Part Three, then, is the top of the pops.

The countdown speeds toward its inevitable end:

Andrew Garfield, "Amazing Spider-Man"7. Amazing Spider-Man. I’ve gone on record multiple times with my reservations about unnecessary reboots. On the other hand, after Spider-Man 3 became the series’ answer to Batman and Robin, it’s hard to argue with the corporate decision to enact damage control and give the series its very own Batman Begins. Director Marc Webb avoids Sam Raimi’s fondness for Lee/Ditko/Romita ambiance in favor of transplanting the cast to a less timeless setting. The results reinforce the same moral without chanting it at us, thrill and thrive on their own terms, and recapture the trademark Spider-sarcasm that was my favorite part of the first few hundred Spider-comics I read in my youth, but regrettably in short supply in Tobey Maguire’s earnest, anxious portrayal.

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My 2012 Movies in Retrospect, #15-8

In part one of our three-part miniseries, I reminisced about my least favorite theatrical experiences of 2012, works that other viewers may have liked a lot more than I did. Part two, then, is a veritable middle-ground parade — movies that weren’t a waste of my time, some even eligible for eventual addition to my library, but were a few steps removed from instant-classic status according to my recondite guidelines.

The countdown advances:

Jeremy Renner, The Bourne Legacy15. The Bourne Legacy. The way my mental math works out, this section of my list contains this year’s zestiest popcorn flicks — action yarns that propelled me along despite nagging storytelling flaws. Jeremy Renner’s two-hour overseas vacation video neatly fits that slot. Though the extended chases pale before the emotional stakes and the intricate cat-and-mouse games of the second and third Bourne chapters, Renner is fun to cheer on anyway as a plainspoken everyman upgraded to an outnumbered battle machine. In that sense it’s the spy-genre equivalent of a Rocky movie, albeit without a satisfying Ivan Drago analogue.

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My 2012 Movies in Retrospect, #23-16

Everyone knows January is National List Month on the Internet, that sacred tradition when the previous year’s creations must be remembered, recapped, and ranked. I’m not immune to the impulse myself. I like movies. I like making lists. It’s bound to happen. For fun-related reasons, since 2000 I’ve kept track of every movie I’ve seen in a theater, year by year. My list is shorter than a real critic’s because no one pays me to go see every release. I do what I can within my means and according to my curiosity level.

The final tabulations reveal I saw twenty-six films in theaters in 2012. However, three of those were officially 2011 releases and are therefore disqualified from being ranked on my 2012 Movies list. Any films I saw on home video — 2012 or otherwise — are also disqualified due to lack of theater. In addition, Les Miserables is disqualified from inclusion because I’m planning to see it this weekend, which will purportedly not fall in 2012. My movie-ranking rules are few, but there they are.

Part one of this three-part miniseries begins with the films I loved least. Links to past reviews and musings are provided for the twenty movies I previously discussed after MCC was launched. Apparently I only saw three 2012 releases prior to April 28, 2012. Blame it on the first-quarter release wasteland.

On with the reverse countdown:

Wrath of the Titans23. Wrath of the Titans. The explosions were clearly the star of the show. The labyrinth lent a welcome assist as the explosions’ chief henchman. The underworld was lacking, and perhaps should’ve spent more time as an understudy to the underworld from Spawn. Now that was a classy underworld, one that really chewed the scenery but was nonetheless generous to its costars, much more of a team player.

The human cast, on the other hand, was largely wasted, and sometimes blocked our view of the real stars. Except for Toby Kebbell’s mild comic relief, the non-CG actors mostly made bold pronouncements at each other, while every move they make requires a bombastic sound effect. Sam Worthington swats at someone, and BOOM! The most nondescript Ares in film history pummels a foe, and SEISMIC THUNDERCRACK! A sleepwalking Liam Neeson tosses lightning darts, and CORE MELTDOWN! Anyone blinks twice, and GATLING GUN! Mostly this felt like a video game sequel to a video game based on the first film. The graphics were bright and easy to absorb, but I get antsy and bored when that’s all I’m doing.

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“The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey”: Thoughts on Old Friends, Orc Stats, and End Credits

The Hobbit: An Unexpected JourneyOf all the movies I wanted to see most in theaters this year, none required as long a wait as The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey did. Due to circumstances beyond my control, I had to sit quietly and wait until its third whole weekend of American release before all schedules properly aligned. Those of you who wait to catch movies on DVD or via basic-cable hatchet job may roll your eyes at my impatience if you must, but I like keeping current on my movies, especially those that have been pinned on my mental calendar for months.

To place my anticipation in perspective: I was required to read The Hobbit in seventh-grade English class. Our teacher was such a fan, we received extra credit if we completed our assignments in green ink. I also have the Mind’s Eye six-cassette audio adaptation and the Chuck Dixon/David Wenzel graphic-novel adaptation. I read The Fellowship of the Ring for a ninth-grade book report, but didn’t read the other two until after the movie trilogy had commenced twenty-five years later. I abandoned the Return of the King appendices after five pages, and once owned a copy of The Book of Lost Tales, Volume 1 that I don’t recall ever opening.

Regardless, I’ve been pacing back and forth, waiting for the chance to see Martin Freeman win as Bilbo. Freeman met all my expectations with the proper combination of exasperation, humility, whimsy, and plucky determination. For that alone, I received my money’s worth and then some.

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My 2012 in Pictures: a Montage of Montages Past and Future

From a purely photographic perspective, our family found 2012 far from boring, to say the least. It wasn’t without its share of trials, tears, and terrors, but it’s my fervent hope that the memories of those invigorating events caught on camera should outlast the emotional scars of the uglier incidents for years to come.

Some of the following subjects are from photo parades previously shared here on MCC. Some are from events that occurred prior to MCC’s inception on April 28, 2012. Some of these are sneak previews of photo parades that have been held in reserve until the conclusion of the 2012 Road Trip series, which is not represented in this gallery since it has its very own de facto home page.

That being said: the lighter side of 2012 from my limited vantage point appeared as follows. Continue reading

My Complete Video Oeuvre, Part 3 of 3: Live from Super Bowl Village

For those just joining us: today concludes the three-part landmark miniseries that chronicles my few feeble forays into the world of video. Not one of these three videos is a crowning achievement; they’re the aesthetic equivalent of lower-tier DVD extras. It’s no coincidence that the sharing of this humbling collection coincides with one of the Internet’s traditionally quietest weeks of the year. Those brash young YouTube stars make it look so simple, but not all of us have the knack for that art form.

In Part One, we watched Chinese acrobats from the sidelines. In Part Two, we watched the award-non-winning live-action short film “Bear on Scooter”. In Part Three, I move from behind the camera to glorious center stage.

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My Complete Video Oeuvre, Part 2 of 3: Bear on Scooter

In our previous precarious episode, the balancing bedazzlement of Chinese acrobats was the first humble example of my limited, sub-amateur experiences in the video medium.

One year later, at the 2010 Indiana State Fair I was stricken a second time by the impulse to test-drive my camera’s modest video function while watching live-action entertainment, just to see what would happen. I vaguely recalled a couple of mistakes not to repeat. This time we had front-facing seats; I kept the running time under a minute; and I found an odder subject.

With no schooling or forethought I created a modern masterpiece of bravery and stunt work, never to be duplicated or understood by rival artistes. The juxtaposition of a formidable force of nature with an understated man-made artifact examines the stark contrast between our attempts to navigate our world and nature’s cold-hearted insistence on denying the fundamental superiority of manifest destiny. On a deeper psychological level, the uneasy alliance between the avatars of ferocity and technology is an exemplary illustration of that innate contradiction known as the duality of man.

My thirty-nine-second magnum opus is called “Bear on Scooter”:

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My Complete Video Oeuvre, Part 1 of 3: the Chinese Acrobats

Some people are skilled with video cameras. Some are talented in front of cameras. Those who lack proper training for either side will see their amateur attempts at moving pictures yield mixed results. This three-part miniseries will clarify for the record why I’m not a vlogger, even though nobody asked.

I’ve never owned a dedicated video camera in my life, never even held or operated someone else’s. My camera has a video function, but it wasn’t a consideration when I bought it because I’ve never been a fan of home movies. I was under the impression that the average camera owner dedicates its use largely to birthday parties, Christmas Day in the living room, and grade-school recitals starring children who aren’t mine. Perhaps other families turn their gatherings into elaborate stage productions, complete with musical numbers and action scenes worth immortalizing for future generations. Our family, not so much. We’re big on photos, but minimalist on real-time recordings.

One sweltering August day at the 2009 Indiana State Fair, I was struck by one of my frequent random whims that always start with the question, “What happens when I do this?” My wife and I had been enjoying the fairground attractions and decided to sample one of the live entertainment options, a troupe of Chinese acrobats who were appearing gratis and weren’t prefaced with stringent disclaimers forbidding A/V recording devices. Just for fun, I decided to see what would happen if I tried filming them instead of merely photographing them, using the camera feature I’d never accessed before.

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A Few of My Favorite Apocalypses

Roland Emmerich's "2012"Remember that time when the world ended on December 21st? And before that on January 1, 2000, at the hands of the Y2K bugaboo? And before that in 1994 as Nostradamus predicted in The Man Who Saw Tomorrow? Neither do I. As the humble survivor of at least three documented ends of the world, I count my blessings and try not to take the failures of those premature endtimes for granted.

In honor of Earth living to rotate another day, I present this cursory clipfest of a few of the most memorable incidents in which someone or something threatened to end or merely ruin life on Earth as we know it. In some cases the day was saved thanks to some meddling kids; in other cases, Earth lost and the survivors pressed on because life had to find a new way. At the bottom are a few provisional inclusions — two stories I haven’t seen through to their conclusions, and two stories I could’ve lived without knowing.

(This list is clearly far from all-inclusive. Beyond what I’m forgetting or dismissing, I’m also setting aside the most famous of all, the one that will end with the Lord’s victory, because of obvious Hall of Fame status. Unfair competition, you see.)

On with the countdown, preferably timed with a red digital readout:

* Falling Skies — If the War of the Worlds Martians had better immune systems, even in victory they’d still have to reckon with the uppity spiritual descendants of America’s founding fathers. As led by the earnest but damaged Noah Wyle and Armageddon survivor Will Patton, the Second Mass is more organized and logical than Revolution, more hope-filled and less defeatist than The Walking Dead, and a lot less canceled than FlashForward.

* 2012 — Not the year itself, but the arguably greatest film of Roland Emmerich’s career has better effects than Godzilla, less jingoism than Independence Day, and higher-quality schmaltz than The Day After Tomorrow. Add in a histrionic John Cusack, a self-parodying Woody Harrelson, and a mandatory impassionate speech at the end delivered by Serenity‘s amazing Chiwetel Ejiofor. With these key components, Emmerich finally nailed the formula he’d striven for years to perfect.

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The Songs That Sweeten My Christmas Spirit

A Charlie Brown ChristmasConsider this list an overdue companion piece to my previous entry, “The Songs That Sour My Christmas Spirit“, in which I griped at length about lumps of audio coal guaranteed never to appear on my personal Christmas playlist. Let it not be said that my only thoughts on the subject are entirely negative, though. There, I tooketh away; here, I giveth.

The songs of the season that catch my ear, lift my spirit, and chase away the holiday errand-running blues, include but are hardly limited to the following, in no particular order:

* * * * *

* Dido, “Christmas Day — I’m not usually a fan of love songs, but I like the ethereal vocals, dreamlike gait, touches of electronica, and the lyrical tale of an anticipated traveler that may or may not be romantic.

* Anyone who cares to sing it, “The First Noel — I’ve been partial to this tune ever since I sang it solo in my school’s Christmas program in sixth grade. As I’ve aged and my spiritual outlook has metamorphosed since then, it’s taken on deeper level of meanings for me. Of all the Christmas songs we learned in school, it arguably receives the least radio airplay and is seldom covered by today’s artists. I’m sad when a song I like is never played, but I appreciate it when it’s not overplayed. For some songs that’s a tough middle ground to find. (I’m looking in your direction, “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”.)

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Morgan Freeman Photos Convey Authority, Win Debates, Certify Anything as Gold

Morgan FreemanDuring the solemn, lamentable weekend following last Friday’s senseless tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut, Facebook users who were already struggling with their own reactions, the reactions of their friends, and the fights breaking out between friends of conflicting reactions all found themselves interrupted dozens of times over the course of the weekend by the reassuring face of Academy Award Winner Morgan Freeman, perceived as one of the kindliest, most grandfatherly figures in all of Hollywood. His face was attached to a short essay decrying the culpability of mass media in encouraging too many broken young men to become power-tripping mass murderers because of the seedy allure of posthumous headlines and ten minutes of front-page infamy. Few would argue with the content of the well-meaning essay, but this wasn’t just any old essay written by an ostensibly intelligent typist. This was an essay attached to a photo of Academy Award Winner Morgan Freeman.

Somehow the photo imbued those words with a godlike acumen that transcended all racial, economic, and spiritual barriers. Within seconds one out of every one-and-a-half Facebook users was forwarding the words and picture to everyone in striking distance under the assumption that they naturally had something to do with each other. No need for fact-checking, no verifying sources, no asking why Freeman would release a public statement as if he’s an official White House spokesman — someone they knew forwarded it to them, so it had to be true.

What you saw probably resembled this, except more professionally cobbled together and without my modified attribution:

Morgan Freeman Fraud Sample

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