I Knew “The Bride!” When She Used to Rock and Roll

Jessie Buckley with blond hair, black 1930s hat and black smudge next to her mouth, screaming into headlights at night.

Not one of Madonna’s better phases.

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover: After nearly thirty years of acting, back in 2021 Maggie Gyllenhaal stepped behind the camera to write and direct her first feature — a heartbreaking novel adaptation called The Lost Daughter, in which Jessie Buckley and Olivia Colman each played the same character at different ages, whose personal issues complicated her unenthusiastic young-adult attempts at motherhood and continued haunting her as life grew increasingly lonelier with age. Both actresses were nominated for Academy Awards, as was Gyllenhaal for Best Adapted Screenplay with such a complicated portrait of a woman in no position to deal with the expectations of everyone around her and The Viewers at Home.

Viewers may feel even more confounded by the writer/director’s sophomore follow-up, a big-budget IP-romp called The Bride! that isn’t a novel adaptation and isn’t quite a remake of James Whale’s iconic Bride of Frankenstein…at least, not all of it. Remember the scene where Elsa Lanchester awakens and screaming at Boris Karloff? Imagine that screaming stretched out to a two-hour runtime, except now she’s screaming at everyone except Frankenstein’s Monster, and somehow the screaming and posturing make her a feminist icon. Or something?

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“Hamnet”: Special Providence in the Fall of a Sparrow

Jessie Buckley in the front row of a standing Shakespearean audience, reaching out to the actor on stage.

The Globe Theatre used to be pretty cool about letting audiences interact with actors on stage, long before trying to tear famous people’s clothes off became a thing.

Oscars season is coming! On January 22nd the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences will announce the next round of Academy Awards nominations. Fans have a month to go before we learn which multi-million-dollar blockbusters will be validated in the secondary categories and which Best Picture nominees were only released in a single Times Square theater that would’ve made more money if they’d just shown porn instead. The more potential Oscar winners we watch now, the less we’ll have to cram into our annual Oscar Quest before the March 15th ceremony. Or, y’know, I could just take the old-fashioned approach: go see films I want to see for my own reasons and hope they get recognized later.

The latter applied for me in regard to Hamnet, the latest from Academy Award Winner Chloe Zhao. Her contemplative road-trip drama Nomadland took Best Picture during the pandemic, and I was among the six viewers who enjoyed Marvel’s disavowed Eternals, in which super-team punch-’em-up veneer cloaked a thoughtful exploration of religious disillusionment, immoral sacrifice in the name of The Greater Good, the soul’s search for purpose and sometimes repurpose, and what the treasured canard of With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility means on a cosmic scale. With Hamnet four years later, she’s retracted her reach from planetary destruction to merely the foundation of classic Western Literature, with a story set in the sixteenth century rather than traveling all the way back to the Dawn of Time. Yet another survivor of the Marvel Machine finds deeper artistic fulfillment on a smaller stage.

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Twelve Angry “Women Talking”

The "Women Talking" movie poster hanging outside a theater at night next to two other posters for female-led films.

Not a lot of helpless damsels in distress out there at the theaters lately.

Sarah Polley’s Women Talking was the last of this year’s ten Best Picture nominees to see a theatrical release outside NYC, L.A., or film festivals, which don’t count as a release into the real world. Now that I’ve seen all ten, I realize it isn’t the flashiest, and it was probably the least expensive to make, but the titular discussion group is now in my Top 3 of that list, in good company with Evelyn Quan and Lydia Tár. Not that they need males vouching for them. On a related note, I imagine a film called Men Vouching would be the worst — just two hours of dudes indiscriminately giving everything two thumbs up, even movies that don’t contain Marvel or DC products. It’d still be better than 90% of all YouTube movie review channels, but not by much.

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