It’s a major award!

Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover: sometimes we see movies in theaters! And for once, it’s finally paid off. No, I don’t mean income or ad clicks or blog views, unless you count the surge of silent American bots that’s been spiking my dashboard stats since February 11th. (Those do not count. If you’re reading this, dear bots: SHOO.)

But hey! Going to the movies recently won me a prize! And it was in the best kind of competition: the kind that you accidentally enter without even knowing you entered. Usually those are transparent email scams aiming to fleece the elderly.

At some point in 2025 I probably got a phone notification for AMC Theatres’ “Ultimate Focus Features Experience Sweepstakes” and promptly swiped it away without reading, as I tend to do for all their app’s messages except “Here’s your ticket for tonight!” As it happens, AMC Stubs members who purchased five tickets to Focus Features films between 8/19/2025 and 1/19/2026 were automatically entered into this sweepstakes — no forms required, no emails, no 500-words essays titled “How Focus Features Changed My Life Forever”.

The grand prize was two separate trips to L.A. (one a 3-day/2-night, the other a 2-day/1-night) to see the world premieres of two other Focus Feature films between 3/1/26 and 3/1/27, including airfare for winners not living within driving distance. Winner may take the same guest both times or different guests to each. And each would include a “meet and greet opportunity with Studio executives and personnel”, but not anyone from the films’ actual casts or crews. So, a chance to meet real live suits and maybe the fine-print employees from the end credits, nestled between the song list and the Special Thanks. Nevertheless, a prize is a prize.

I knew about none of this till a few weeks ago when I received official notice that I’d won a prize in this heretofore way-off-the-sonar affair. After some research — which included proofreading the email for blatant spelling errors and cursoring over any links, among other anti-phishing safeguards taught in fraud prevention classes — I found the official sweepstakes rules on AMC’s website, including the mandatory boilerplate requiring them to let freeloaders mail in entries under the No Purchase Required loophole. It was real.

I rechecked my records and memories, and realized how I’d qualified: one ticket for Hamnet, tickets for Bugonia for myself and my son, and tickets for Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale for myself and my wife Anne. Presto!

I didn’t win the grand prize, but unmentioned in the official rules were other prizes given away. As lucky unwitting contestant #7,216 or whatever, I won a gift certificate for the Focus Features section of the NBC Universal merch store. (No, that isn’t an affiliate link. Again: MCC is not a financially healthy day-job kind of site, or even a passable second job to save up spare change to buy more comics. It’s a big lovable money pit, same as any other hobby.)

After much hemming and hawing and wishing they offered a Phoenician Scheme shirt with a screen shot of Benecio del Toro saying, “Help Yourself to a Hand Grenade”, I decided to go obscure: I redeemed the code for the sweatshirt in our lead photo, designed for fans of The Holdovers, the best new movie I saw at home in 2023 as fake in-universe clothing from the boarding school where Paul Giamatti, Dominic Sessa and Da’Vine Joy Randolph end up spending a lonely Christmas break together. Fake in-universe gear is among my favorite kinds of pop-culture souvenirs, much like the “Troy and Abed in the Morning” mug I picked up in person from the NBC Store in Manhattan back in 2011. The average onlooker won’t care, but to me it’s kinda awesome. The code covered the shirt in full, plus a little of the S&H fees.

So remember, folks: go see movies! You never know when they might throw freebies at you.

As for me, I can’t wait to impress the exactly zero viewers here in Indiana who’ll recognize the name “Barton Academy” on sight. Alternatively, it’ll come in handy whenever my office has a “wear your school/college gear to work” day, which has been known to happen. I’ve never owned a single article of clothing with a college or school logo on it in my entire life, real or fictional. Now I can wear this, pretend to fit in with normal people for a change, and see if anyone calls my bluff.