In the Edible Flower Garden, purple is a vegetable!
Previously on Midlife Crisis Crossover:
Each year Anne and I take one (1) road trip to a different part of the United States and see attractions, wonders, and events we didn’t have back home. One thing we rarely do is fly. We’d much rather drive than be flown unless we absolutely have to…or are given some pretty sweet incentives to do so. Fast-forward to December 2022 and a most unexpected opportunity: The Powers That Be at Anne’s rather large place of employment recognized her and several other employees nationwide for outstanding achievements in the field of excellence. Their grand prize was a Disney World vacation! We could at last announce to friends and family, “THE GOLDENS ARE GOING TO DISNEY WORLD!”
For Anne it was officially, legally a business trip. Much of the time, she’d have to work. Not ME, baby…
One billion Disney-branded blogs out there in the monetized social-media spheres are more than happy to tell you the details of their thrill-ride experiences and boast about the joy of living large without fear of motion sickness. Sure, EPCOT has its share of astronaut training modules for civilians, but I was content to explore its other identity as an outdoor international shopping mall and museum complex, like a smaller Washington DC minus the politicians. I’ve already recounted my initial EPCOT escapades on Spaceship Earth and the more jolting, more IP-forward Ratatouille ride. But at a certain stage in adulthood, sometimes you just want an easy comfort ride that barely counts as a “ride”.
The many faces of Earth, hanging inside the Land Pavilion.
The path from Spaceship Earth led me to their World Nature section — basically “National Geographic: The Park” — and a hub called The Land Pavilion, which contains a number of educational ecological attractions with no Disney cartoon characters attached to them. On a strong recommendation from our old friend Nanci, my then-50-year-old self enjoyed some leisurely quality time on an even gentler excursion tailor-made for elderly patrons, helpless babies who don’t appreciate G-force acceleration, and horticulturists who’d also love their annual Flower and Garden Festival.
Living with the Land is one of those calm boat rides that’s more like a spa service than an amusement park adventure. Guests share a boat with strangers and float downstream through the middle of a geodesic dome. On either shore are labs and facilities exploring and/or simulating alternative farming methods, which seem to number more than they did in my childhood when I thought hydroponics were cutting-edge. The environments, lighting, and produce varies along the air-conditioned greenhouse canal. A narrator said stuff, but I didn’t take notes because there was no quiz later.
Fiddlehead ferns, as seen on Chopped.
Tiny waterfalls amid the greenery.
Date palm, looking like a mutant pineapple.
A selection of the end results from their spice crops.
Fluted pumpkins, which probably have their fans but will never catch the eye of the Great Pumpkin.
A red-light district but for flora.
Eggplants grown in captivity.
Peppers! These seemed a more exciting novelty in person than in photo.
A demonstration of Nutrient Film Technique — actual hydroponics in action.
Kale, Brussels sprouts, and other fresh greens. Much of this exhibit’s results are served in Disney World restaurants.
We began with purple, we end with purple: tissue cultures in the Biotechnology section.
…and that’s the soothing Living with the Land agricultural float-through.
While in the Land Pavilion, I also sat in for a screening of a 4-D short film called Awesome Planet. As the audience is gently nudged with light moisture and fanning, and possibly some smells I ignored, we’re told about the various climates and environments around this great big Earth of ours and how it’d be really keen if all of them — even the really deadly ones — were to continue to exist. Obviously I wasn’t taking pics during a film, but I didn’t even take a photo of its entrance for context. As for the contents, I was too relaxed by Living with the Land to take notes, and too distracted with one incessant thought: “WHERE HAVE I HEARD THAT VOICE?” Not until much later did I learn the narrator was Ty Burrell (Modern Family, Muppets Most Wanted). It was a harmless, footnote-sized epilogue to the boat ride. Then I got back to walking miles in sunshine to see what else EPCOT had to offer.
To be continued!
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Midlife Crisis Crossover! 