Fit into our Christmas tree theme this year, Santa Yoda does.
Christmas! Christmas! Christmas! Christmas! Christmas!
That time of year we celebrate Christ’s birth and the fulfillment that came with it. That blessed season when we wrap up the year with one last multi-platform shopping marathon. That timeless trial when we find out how strong or how weak the communication lines are between distaff family members. That awkward negotiation over which gatherings we are or aren’t attending. That discomfiting anticipation that somewhere out there is a stress-induced tantrum with our name on it. That quick escalation into spiraling darkness if you don’t snap out of it and remind yourself of the reasons for the season, the fruits of the spirit, and oh what fun it is to ride and so on.
In honor of the main event, please enjoy this humble collection of random moments from the past few weeks that highlight local gentle reminders of the occasion and the joy inherent in holiday decorating. We here at Midlife Crisis Crossover wish you ‘n’ yours a super Merry Christmas, and we do hope you get the opportunity to connect with loved ones in between multiple showings of The Force Awakens.
Our 2015 Christmas tree theme was to use all our Santa-based ornaments. I’d planned a photo entry in its honor called “The Year With Only Santa Claus” but ultimately scrapped it because none of them were edgy enough for today’s fickle internet audiences. One curious specimen in our Santa lineup was this rare attempt by Pepsi to steal the big man back from Coca-Cola. Nice try, PepsiCo.
Meanwhile at work, my unit got its own tree and decided we’d hand-craft our own ornaments using snowflake cutouts, shiny beads, glue sticks, and limited art supplies. I took an extreme lo-fi approach in this all-text flake that looks like I designed it while hiding out in a mountainside shack. To this day I don’t think any of my coworkers have squinted hard enough to read what I scribbled on it.
My coworkers had so much fun with DIY decor that someone decided we should all do an encore using only a square piece of paper with a flat elf’s chalk outline on it, tiny unflattering pics of ourselves, and a box of markers. We were supposed to use our headshot as the elf’s face, but I decided my elf deserved his own face and instead dressed him in a Midlife Crisis Crossover shirt. Hopefully his bizarre stylistic choice inspires his fellow flat elfin friends to spend more money on my new line of licensed merchandise starring me me me.
The central Christmas tree in the courtyard of the Plainfield outdoor mall formerly called Metropolis, which they’re now attempting to rebrand as “The Shops at Perry Crossing”. This is unnecessary and bland-ifying. The name was fine. The shops are fine, now more than ever since they recently added an excellent comic shop. “Perry Crossing” sounds like the name of a Perry Como tribute band from Branson.
Each year the city of Indianapolis turns the downtown Soldiers and Sailors’ Monument into what’s billed as “the world’s largest Christmas tree”, complete with lighting ceremony and local musical acts. Trust me, it’s prettier at night.
We can always depend on the OneAmerica Tower for a fully loaded tree, day or night.
The hearth in the foyer of Gray Bros. Cafeteria (as seen on Man v. Food!), where part of my wife’s family gathers for a Christmas meal each year. Hearty, heavy stuff.
Anne reunites with our old friend Bullseye the Target Dog! A small, stuffed version of Bullseye accompanied us on our 2003 road trip to Washington, DC, then disappeared from my son’s clutches without a trace. And now here he is, larger and cuter and more commercial than ever!
Best gift so far is this lovely tin with transparent lid that a coworker gave to each of us. Inside are homemade pumpkin, cherry, and lemon tarts. It’s creative presents like this that make me want to be better at Christmas.