If the lively debates on my social-media feeds are any indication, our family may well be the last people in America to see Man of Steel. I’m glad that’ll be rectified within the next eighteen hours. Unfortunately, in order for the film’s surprises to retain as much of their intended impact as possible, I’ve shifted myself into selective internet blindness this evening.

I’ve shunned Twitter’s outbreak of Man of Steel discussion groups. I’ve refused to read any reviews, whether they carry a courtesy spoiler alert or not. I’m even temporarily resisting the urge to read what I understand from several sources (while held at arm’s length, mind you) is a fascinating dissection of the movie by Superman: Birthright writer Mark Waid, a generally awesome comics creator who’s also one of the universe’s most devout Superman fans. Someday I’d love to read his thoughts, but it won’t be this moment.

Though I feel a few steps away from sensory deprivation, I’ve found ways to occupy my time and play catch-up on numerous second-tier online activities:

* A YouTube marathon of “Honest Trailers”.
* Preparing for a one-day road trip with my son on Monday.
* Crushing my Words with Friends opponents even more ruthlessly than usual.
* Finally hearing that new Pixies song, “Bam Thwok”, that I forgot to hunt down a few years back.
* A few “Honest Trailers” encores.
* Catching up with the recent events of all my Facebook friends, not just the really interesting ones.
* Viewing John Oliver’s first ten minutes hosting The Daily Show.
* Reading Patton Oswalt’s new, inspired, candid, trilogy-length, confessional essay about his least favorite media moments so far this year. (Thankfully it has nothing to do with Man of Steel.)
* Copying down movie showtimes for tomorrow.
* Reminding myself which non-WordPress blogs I follow through Feedly.
* A couple of “Honest Trailer” second encores, skipping to the “Starring” part near the end, usually my favorite bit.
* Some light reading off the internet. (Dark Horse’s Star Wars #6 is right here beside me. So far, Brian Wood’s take is less straightforward and more artful than the average SW comic. Nice to see Leia in the middle of the action, too.)
* Adding an app or two to that smartphone I mentioned not too long ago.

…not that any of that is really inspiring me on the writing front just now. But it’s safe. With the Hermit Protocol in place, I stand a chance of enjoying the movie tomorrow afternoon on its own terms, preserving the emotional sensations as much as possible instead of scrounging for every spoiler I can find and reducing my first showing to a cold, joyless, clinical dissection.

Besides, I’ve already had my share of spoiler annoyances this month. Several months behind the rest of the viewing public, my wife and I just reached the halfway point of Downton Abbey season three this week, but I’ve already had events in the back half of the season spoiled by two different headlines on two different websites in the past week. To be honest, I expected far worse. It’s a wonder we don’t already know every story beat by now. If only I had the option of unknowing the spoilers.